Perception plays an important role in how we judge people, especially the first impression. The way you look, the way you speak, the way you behave. It all tells a story about you, be it fictional or factual. That is why giving a good first impression is vital in securing a good relationship with a person, which leads to a positive communication process.
I am a person who judges people based on my observations of their behaviors. When I see a person for the first time, for example a classmate, i would observe his/her behavior throughout the lesson and make certain assumptions about his/her behavior. Nevertheless, i would continue to assess his/her behavior after the first encounter to verify my assumptions.
Undeniably, stereotypical characteristics are applied just from the way they dress. These stereotypes are personal constructs and can be shaped from many different sources, such as our own experience, the media that we consume, what others tell us, etc. The way that they dress greatly shapes how we perceive their character/personality.
Next would be the behaviors. Everyone, including me, applies "getting-to-know-you" script whenever we meet a person for the first time. Through a conversation like this, we subconsciously assess their actions, responses and behaviors. As mentioned above, even before we start to speak to them, we would make certain judgment on the person's personality based on how they dress. This affects the communication process as we might change our attitude while we continue to assess them. As we tend to attribute their behaviors to their personality, we should take into account of the situation, so as not to create perceptual errors.
Of course, when you judge that person with negative characteristics, you tend to pick up verbal or non-verbal cues that verifies your perception. This can take a toll when you are making new friends in a new environment. Therefore, it is important that we interact with an open-minded and try not to judge the person as a whole on the first meeting. And also, we should not attribute every negative behavior to their personality. Who knows, we might find similarities which acts as the basis for the start of a life-long relationship.
7 comments:
Indeed, we should interact with an open mind. However, we need to take note of certain human tendencies. One of which is closure, our tendency to jump to conclusions. When we have certain assumptions about someone, we will have a early conclusion to what type of person he is. As we continue to interact with the person, we may reshape out concept about him. Thus, we should also beware of certain human tendencies which may have negative effects in our relationship with others.
First impression is important as you do not know what kind of person that person is and first impression shapes what you perceive of that person. As time goes by, even if the person appears to be not the person you thought he or she might be during your first encounter, still one might tend to remain skeptical and bias towards he or she. Thus, it is important that one should always keep an open mind in order to look at things in different perceptions. Justify these perceptions made before judging what kind of person he or she is.
I feel that perception is a common aspect in our daily lives. Besides first impressions, perception also plays a part in our interpretation of a message, social issue or situation.
It is a fact that many people judge others based on first impressions. Although this may seem quite unfair, I think that time will still be a deciding factor for understanding a person. Therefore, we do not have to worry too much about creating a good first impression, except for job interviews.
"When I see a person for the first time... i would observe his/her behavior throughout the lesson and make certain assumptions about his/her behavior."
sorry, but this sounds creepy! sounds like a hunter trying to prey on its prey by observing them first...
anyway, i agree that perception plays an important role in how we perceive others. For example, person A may view someone who dressed vintage-ly as cool while person B ay view this vintage-ly dressed as a freak. it depends on individuals, i guess. a lot of times, it depends on our cultural background. and sometimes, it even reflects our cultural backgrounds.
i like your reflection on the last paragraph. i thought that this is quite true.
hello!
it's funny that you judge a person by their behaviour first. usually my perception is based on how people portray themselves by the way they dress and the way they speak.
But it would be best if people were to have an open mind when meeting new people as everyone should be given at least a chance in impressing anyone.
(:
In my own opinion, i don't find first impression accurate at all, that is if the person you are judging knows that you're accessing him or her. Especially during interviews, or speed date etc...the person you are judging might fake a goodie goodie image for his or her self interest. Therefore, i always believe that impressions given off unintentionally is much more accurate than impressions given on purpose. We should thus not base our perceptions on first impressions only, but on continuous evaluation.
First impressions are very, very important. Yes, we do have our own scripts and personal constructs, but we should not let those frame of references cloud our perceptions of others, and in the end, not be able to explore the individuality of the person.
Keeping an open mind and disregarding stereotypes sounds like a better idea to me, as then, I would be getting to know the person, not a representative of a particular social class, background, school, ethnic group, nationality or sex.
Yes, we should not judge the person as a whole. I mean, at the end of the day, the little information we might have of that individual might not be representative of him/her at all.
My best friend, Joanna and I met in JC and initially, we didn't like each other. I thought she was cold and she always had very 'blah' things to say. Then, our Literature teacher paired us up together for a project and we had to hang out and we realized that we had a lot of things in common. We started meeting up more and forged a great friendship. And that was 6 years ago. Today, she's still my best friend and I was just on the phone with her a few hours ago. I am glad I threw my personal constructs out of the window, and took a chance.
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